It Can Wait

This past week felt pretty hectic, even though it was fairly typical (minus spring break).  Unfortunately for my 8 year old, we didn’t really do anything fun or exciting this year for his Spring Break.  Traveling with an infant that still naps 3 times a day is not my idea of a good time, and thankfully he’s been very understanding that all of the changes that are happening right now are temporary.  It’s made me reflect on all of the things I’ve decided can wait for the first year or so of Lila’s life.  When Enrique was a baby, I felt a lot of pressure to get back to regular life quickly.  Traveling, family obligations, work, working out, all of it.  This time around, there’s a lot of things in the “it can wait” bucket.  Which is what I’m focusing on this week.

It Can Wait

A non-exhaustive list of things that are not priority right now.

  • Running fast – I’m sure there are plenty of women who recover from pregnancy and regain strength and speed fairly quickly. While my body has allowed me to return to running, it’s just not ready to run fast (or very long), and it probably won’t be ready for at least another 6 months. And instead of pushing through, and risking some things I’m not ok with, like pelvic pro-lapse, I’m just embracing my runs as slow, enjoyable “me” time.
  • Promotions at work – I do believe that women are 100% capable of finding ways to succeed at work without sacrificing family. But for the first year of Lila’s life, I just don’t think my brain is ready to take on any more responsibility. Or to really learn a new role. I’m also taking a lot more time away from work than I usually would. I’m the person who typically reserves sick days for days that I am actually too sick to function, but lately I’m not shying away from using a sick day to recover after a hard day. Mental health days aren’t any less important!
  • Losing baby weight – Honestly, I lost most of what I had gained after Enrique within about 6ish months, but my body was completely different than it was before. This time around, with breastfeeding and trying to regain strength that I lost during pregnancy, I still haven’t really made any changes on the scale. I may get back to my pre-baby weight once I stop breastfeeding, but I may not. Because my weight is still at a healthy place for my body, I really don’t care at this point.
  • Travel – This is just my preference and perspective. I HATE traveling with babies. Yes, I know everyone survives. I know some people feel really strongly that traveling with babies is an important experience. I’m just not one of them. I don’t have a good time. It’s stressful, exhausting, and not enjoyable for me. So why do it? Because I think it will help my baby “get used to” traveling? I don’t travel frequently enough for this to work or be useful. Now, for something that is a once in a lifetime situation, like my best friends wedding, I might consider it. But for something that can be pushed off a couple years, like DisneyWorld, I’ll just wait until I’ll actually enjoy it.
  • Long Visits – Again, this is just my perspective and preference. I love having friends from out of town come and stay with us for short visits. Especially if we’ve got plans to do fun things like hit the trails or go somewhere special for dinner. Short visits are great. Long visits, though, require a little more planning, patience, and flexibility than what I really want to give right now. I know a lot of people find that having family visit is super helpful, but for me, it’s more difficult than beneficial when it exceeds about 2 nights. So if the visit is really to help me out, let’s keep it at a weekend.
  • Busy Weekends – Speaking of weekends, as a full time working mom, the 48 hours that I have no work responsibility is absolutely sacred for me. It is the only time I have to thoroughly clean my house, lay in bed while Lila naps, or just decompress without having to feel like I should be doing something productive. So trying to pack in a lunch with friends and a long run and my sons baseball game just isn’t happening right now. We’ve got naps and feedings and a lot of things to do, so for now I’m spacing out the extra-curriculars a little further than normal.
  • Dishes – I’m one of those type-a people that really needs to feel like things are in order. And this whole living in a not as clean as I’d like it house has been rough for me. But the truth is, it can’t all get done in one day like it used to. I know there will be a day when Lila can be entertained by playing with big brother for a solid hour, and our day to day routine won’t revolve around her nap schedule, but that day is not today. And it won’t be tomorrow. So if the dishes have to wait a little longer than I’d like, well I just won’t look at them for too long I guess.

And a few things that are priority:

  • Rebuilding my core – I have specific time blocked out of my schedule twice a week specifically for core exercises. And not because I want abs for summer. Because running and lifting and not peeing when I laugh are not possible without real effort and focus on rebuilding my core strength. And all of those things are important to me.
  • My mental health – Because I’m just not wealthy enough to take 2-6 weeks recovering from “exhaustion” in a treatment facility. More importantly, I want my kids to have me my best. And I want them to see that mental health is worth time and effort.
  • Getting adequate rest – This can sound laughable when I say that it’s something I keep as a priority as a mom. But the truth is that everything kinda falls apart when I’m not getting decent rest. Now, I expected to have some interrupted sleep for a few months, and was prepared for that. And I was very fortuante that Lila got on the sleeping through the night thing pretty quickly. But I did put some real thought into setting a good foundation for her to figure sleep out. I watched the newborn class offered by Taking Cara Babies multiple times while I was pregnant and in her first weeks of life. I also take recovery weeks religiously, and if I didn’t get good sleep the night before, I take at least half a sick day so I can rest while she naps. I know I can’t function without adequate rest, and I’m not someone who wants to pretend like 4-5 hours is enough for me.
  • Hydration and Nutrition – This has always been a priority of mine, but as an athlete who is also breastfeeding, it’s completely non-negotiable. There have been times that I am late for meetings, or ask the nanny to stay an extra 10 minutes, or spend half my Sunday meal prepping. I know getting in the calories and water has to happen, and whatever it takes, I’m making it happen.
  • Time outside – Every. Single. Day. Unless there is a hurricane. Because it helps me not lose my mind when everything falls off the rails. Which usually happens a couple times a month. Sometimes it’s stroller walks, sometimes it’s walking around the block while I’m called into a meeting, sometimes it’s just taking Lila into the backyard to look at shadows and leaves. Regardless, I get outside as much as possible, but at least once a day.

This weeks was slightly wonky, schedule wise, because it was my sons Spring Break.  I took Monday off work, because our nanny had asked to swap her Tuesday off for Monday and Henry had a busy work day.  Juggling two kids and work without a nanny or Henry just was not appealing to me in any way.  So I took the day as a full rest day, which meant the rest of the week was a little more challenging.  Having four back to back days of CrossFit workouts and running isn’t ideal, but I can manage it every once in a while, especially if I need to because of scheduling.  I meant to get up to run on Tuesday, but somehow hadn’t set my alarm, so womp womp.

My son had a baseball camp during the day Tuesday and Wednesday, which let me work mostly as usual for both days. He was home Thursday, but I had the nanny here to take care of Lila and Henry was home for most of the day. I had asked my dad to come hang out with him for a couple of hours on Friday, since Henry had a busy work day. My dad came by and got to see Lila for a little less than an hour, and then took Enrique out to lunch and to ride some trails on their bikes for a few hours while Lila napped and I worked out. It seems to take a lot more planning to get through these weeks, but it eventually all worked out nicely.

Since I had planned on this week being a recovery week, I knew it would be a good opportunity for me to hit the trails for my shorter long run on Saturday.  After I fed Lila, I ran out the door, headed out to Friedrich, and had an amazing 7 mile run.  It’s the longest trail run I’ve done since Lila was born, and I was so happy to get to run my favorite route and have some time to myself after a hectic week.  I spent the rest of the day just kind of relaxing with the family.  We went out for a walk together in the afternoon, and the weather was beautiful.  Henry picked up burgers for dinner, which meant we didn’t have to worry about the kitchen, and it was kind of the perfect day.

This Weeks Workouts

Total Miles: 16.84 Miles
Total Workouts: 4
How the Run Felt
This was a nice recovery week for me.  I dropped my weekday runs down to 3 miles, and ran them straight through with no walking breaks.  I’m still doing all of my runs on the treadmill because of the timing, but I watched a couple of Netflix movies and enjoyed being able to run without intervals.  All of my runs felt quick and easy.

Saturday’s trail miles were absolutely perfect.  It was sunny, and in the high 40’s when I started, so it felt pretty chilly on the shadier parts of the trails.  It warmed up super fast though, and I was really happy I decided to carry my hydration pack so I could shove my gloves and headband in a pocket when it warmed up.  I started listening to a new podcast, I didn’t fall, and I made it back in time to take a shower and feed Lila.

How the WODs Felt
This weeks programming was pretty challenging for me.  I was expecting more of a recovery week after the open, so I was pretty surprised.  Wednesday’s WOD wasn’t too hard, but my quads were definitely sore the next day.  Thursday’s WOD was just relentless and never ending. Trying to get those 21 reps into one minute was not happening.  Thursday and Friday’s workouts were both sooooo long.  They both took me over 30 minutes to finish, and I felt like a freaking grey hound getting those 30 shuttle runs in.  I never, ever want to see 100 un-partitioned push ups in a workout.  My arms felt like they were going to fall off.

What I’ve Been Listening To
I am still deep into The Shadow Girls and Trapped in Treatment, but I did decide to start a new podcast during this weeks long run.  It’s called The Pink Moon Murders, and it is an investigative podcast into the unsolved murders of 8 members of a family in Ohio.  The same murder was covered in The Piketown Massacre, which I started but never finished.  The Piketown Massacre kind of fizzled for me towards the last few episodes and didn’t hold my interest.  The Pink Moon Murders definitely seems a little more engaging so far, but with so many victims, it’s honestly hard to track the entire story just by listening.  But so far, I’m liking it.

What Went Well
Being able to get in all of my workouts during my sons spring break was a huge win for me.

What Went Shitty
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have some mom guilt about the fact that we didn’t do anything super exciting over spring break for my 8 year old.

Plans to Improve Next Week
I’m actually taking a full week off work next week to take a project management training course, so I’m really looking forward to having a little more schedule flexibility.

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